You know that feeling when you're reading a LinkedIn post or a formal email and something just feels... off? It’s not that the grammar is bad. Usually, the grammar is actually too perfect. It’s that the person is trying way too hard to sound like someone they aren't. We call this affectation in a sentence, and honestly, it’s the quickest way to lose an audience’s trust.
Writing is weird.
When we talk to friends, we're natural. But the moment we open a Google Doc, we start reaching for words like "utilize" instead of "use" or "subsequent to" instead of "after." That’s affectation. It’s a decorative mask. It’s the linguistic equivalent of wearing a tuxedo to a backyard barbecue. You might think you look sophisticated, but everyone else is just wondering why you can’t relax.
What People Get Wrong About Affectation
Most people think affectation is just using big words. It’s not. If a nuclear physicist uses the word "thermodynamics," that isn't an affectation; it’s just their job.
Affectation happens when the language doesn't match the speaker, the subject, or the audience. It’s about intent. Are you choosing that word because it’s the most precise tool for the job, or are you choosing it because you want to seem smart?
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In his classic essay Politics and the English Language, George Orwell went after this hard. He hated "pretentious diction." He argued that people use fancy words to dress up simple (or even dishonest) ideas. When you see affectation in a sentence, you’re often seeing a writer who is afraid that their actual thoughts aren't good enough. So, they hide behind a curtain of syllables.
The "Fancy Word" Trap
Take the word "plethora." It’s a favorite for students and corporate middle managers everywhere.
- Affected: "There is a plethora of logistical challenges regarding the implementation phase."
- Natural: "We have a lot of problems with the setup."
The first one sounds like a robot trying to get a promotion. The second one sounds like a human being telling the truth.
But it’s not just about long words. Sometimes affectation is about adopting a "voice" that isn't yours. We see this a lot in "corporate-speak" or when people try to sound British or academic when they aren't. It’s a performance. And like any bad performance, the audience can see the sweat.
Spotting Affectation in a Sentence Before You Hit Send
How do you know if you're doing it? It’s harder than it looks because we’ve been trained by years of school to think that "formal" equals "good."
One of the best ways to spot an affected sentence is to read it out loud. Seriously. Your ears are better editors than your eyes. If you stumble over a phrase, or if you’d never say it to a person standing in front of you, it’s probably affected.
Look for these red flags:
1. Archaic Connectors: Words like "henceforth," "whereby," or "whilst" (unless you are actually British and it's 1920).
2. Nominalization: This is a fancy way of saying "turning verbs into nouns." Instead of "deciding," you say "making a decision." Instead of "acting," you say "taking action." It adds weight without adding meaning.
3. The Passive Voice: "It was observed by the management that..." instead of "We saw..."
Language experts like Steven Pinker often talk about "The Curse of Knowledge," but there’s also a "Curse of Insecurity." We overcompensate. We think that if we write simply, people will think we’re simple. In reality, the most brilliant people—think Richard Feynman or Maya Angelou—often used the simplest language to explain the most complex human experiences.
Why We Do It (The Psychology of Pretense)
We want to belong. That's the truth of it.
When you start a new job in tech or law, you hear everyone using specific jargon and a certain stiff tone. You start to use affectation in a sentence because you want to signal that you’re part of the "in-group." Sociolinguists call this "convergence." We move our speech patterns closer to the people we want to impress.
The problem is that on the page, this usually backfires. Instead of looking like an expert, you look like an amateur wearing your dad's suit.
There’s a famous study by Daniel Oppenheimer titled Consequences of Erudite Vernacular Irrespective of Usefulness: Problems with Using Long Words Needlessly. It’s a mouthful, right? That’s the joke. He found that when writers use overly complex language, readers actually perceive them as less intelligent.
Complexity suggests you don't understand your own point well enough to simplify it.
Style vs. Affectation
Is all stylish writing affected? No way.
There’s a big difference between having a unique style and having an affectation. Style is an extension of your personality. It’s consistent. Think of Hunter S. Thompson or Joan Didion. Their writing is distinct, but it feels earned.
Affectation feels like a costume you can take off.
How to Clean Your Writing
If you realize your draft is buried under a layer of pretension, don't panic. You don't have to delete everything. You just need to strip it back.
Start by looking at your verbs.
Verbs are the engine of a sentence. If your engine is "is" or "was" or "has been," your sentence is idling. Affected writing loves weak verbs because they feel "safe" and objective. Swap them for something with teeth.
- Instead of: "The data is suggestive of a decline in user engagement."
- Try: "The data shows users are leaving."
Notice how much faster that second sentence moves? It’s not just shorter; it’s more honest. You aren't hiding behind "suggestive of." You’re making a claim.
The "So What?" Test
Every time you use a word that you wouldn't use in a coffee shop, ask yourself: Why am I using this? If the answer is "to be precise," keep it.
If the answer is "to sound professional," kill it.
Precision is your friend. If you’re writing about wine and you use the word "tannic," that’s precision. If you’re writing about a bad movie and you call it "an egregious affront to the cinematic arts," that’s affectation in a sentence. You’re just saying it was a bad movie, but you’re doing it with a pinky in the air.
Actionable Steps to Kill the Cringe
Writing without affectation doesn't mean writing like a fifth-grader. It means writing with clarity and confidence.
First, embrace the "Zero Draft."
When you first start writing, don't worry about being professional. Write like you’re talking to a friend who is slightly annoyed and wants you to get to the point. Use slang. Use contractions. Use "kinda" and "basically." You can always tighten it up later, but it’s much easier to add a little polish to a natural voice than it is to remove the stiffness from a fake one.
Second, watch your adjectives. Adjectives are where affectation lives. We use them to tell the reader how to feel instead of showing them what’s happening. Words like "stunning," "incredible," or "deeply moving" are often just filler. If something is stunning, describe it. Let the reader decide if they’re stunned.
Third, vary your sentence length. Affected writing often has a monotonous rhythm. It’s a series of medium-length sentences that all sound the same. Break it up. Give the reader a short, punchy sentence. Then follow it with a longer, more flowing one that explains the nuance.
Fourth, check your "I" statements. Sometimes we use affectations to avoid saying "I." We say "The author believes" or "It is the opinion of this writer." Just say "I think." It’s okay. You wrote the thing; we know it’s your opinion. Owning your perspective is a sign of authority, not a lack of professionalism.
A Quick Checklist for Better Sentences
- Use "use" instead of "utilize."
- Use "about" instead of "regarding."
- Use "help" instead of "facilitate."
- Delete "very," "really," and "actually" unless they're doing heavy lifting.
- If you can cut a word and the meaning stays the same, cut it.
The goal isn't to be "plain." The goal is to be transparent. You want the reader to see your ideas, not the words you used to wrap them in. When you remove affectation in a sentence, you’re clearing the brush so people can finally see the path you’re trying to lead them down.
It takes guts to write simply. It feels vulnerable. But that’s exactly why it works.
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Go through your most recent email or article right now. Find one sentence where you were trying to sound "impressive" and rewrite it to be "clear." You’ll probably find that the clearer version is actually the one that impresses people.
Stop performing. Start communicating.