When Elizabeth Gilbert sat down with The Cut, she wasn't just the "Eat Pray Love" lady anymore. She was a woman who had just lived through what most people would call a nightmare, though she might call it a "cosmic assignment." If you’ve been following her journey, you know the basic beats: the global fame, the marriage she left for her best friend Rayya Elias, and the devastating loss of Rayya to cancer in 2018. But the narrative shifted recently. With the release of her 2025 memoir, All the Way to the River, and the accompanying media cycle, the glossy image of "finding yourself" has been replaced by something much darker, grit-filled, and, frankly, polarizing.
Honestly, the profile in The Cut and her subsequent interviews have left fans and critics divided. Some see a woman practicing radical honesty. Others see a wealthy author oversharing in a way that feels, well, a bit unhinged.
The Reality Behind the Rayya Elias Story
For years, we heard about the "sacred" transition of their friendship into romance. Gilbert famously announced her love for Rayya after the latter was diagnosed with terminal liver and pancreatic cancer. It sounded like a movie. However, the details emerging now—highlighted in recent profiles—paint a picture of absolute chaos.
Rayya wasn't just a dying friend; she was a relapsed addict. She had spent decades in and out of jails and institutions before getting clean. When the cancer hit, the "dragon" came back. According to Gilbert’s own admissions, she didn't just stand by her; she enabled her. We’re talking about a world where the author of Big Magic was tied-off limbs and held flashlights so her partner could find a vein.
The Murder Plot No One Expected
This is the part that stopped everyone in their tracks. During the height of the caregiver burnout—what Gilbert calls the "ninth circle of hell"—she actually planned to kill Rayya.
- The Reason: Rayya had become "vicious and cruel" under the influence of drugs and terminal illness.
- The Plan: Gilbert intended to use a combination of sleeping pills and fentanyl patches to end it.
- The Outcome: She didn't go through with it. She admits she stopped because Rayya started to suspect something was up.
It’s a chilling admission. Gilbert told The Cut and other outlets that she has "no shame" about it now because it was part of her "insanity" as a sex and love addict. That’s the pivot she’s making: framing her codependency and these dark impulses as a clinical addiction she’s now recovering from through 12-step programs.
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Elizabeth Gilbert and The Cut: A Study in "Priv-Lit"
There is a growing chorus of critics who look at Gilbert’s lifestyle—the 600-square-foot apartment in New York (which is still a luxury for many), the ability to delete all her emails without responding, and the freedom to postpone entire books—and see a massive amount of privilege.
Remember the 2023 controversy over The Snow Forest?
She pulled her novel, set in 1930s Siberia, because Ukrainian readers felt it was insensitive to publish a book set in Russia during the ongoing invasion. It was a "fantastically grand gesture," as some called it, but it also sparked a huge debate about censorship and whether an author should let their audience dictate their output. In her Cut interview and subsequent talks, she leans into this idea of "protecting the peace" and guarding her morning "ferociously" before "disasters" happen.
To some, this is peak self-care. To others, it's a level of detachment that only a multimillionaire author can afford.
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What Most People Get Wrong About Her Recovery
People often think Gilbert is just "sad" about Rayya. But her current state is actually focused on Sex and Love Addiction (SLAA).
She’s been celibate for long stretches. She talks about "using people like drugs." Basically, she realized that her pattern wasn't just about being a "romantic"—it was about a desperate, clawing need to have someone else make her feel safe.
Why the New Memoir is Polarizing
All the Way to the River has been called "excruciating to read" by some major outlets. The criticism isn't just about the dark subject matter; it's about the tone. There’s a "disciplined gushing" that Gilbert is known for. She uses phrases like "Earth school" and claims she got permission to write the book from Rayya's spirit.
If you're a fan of her spiritual vibes, you'll probably find it profound. If you're a skeptic, you might find it solipsistic. She admits she was a "vampire" trying to drain all the love from Rayya before she died. That kind of self-awareness is rare, but it's also heavy.
The Takeaway: How to Navigate "Gilbert-Style" Honesty
Whatever you think of her, Elizabeth Gilbert is a master at the "public essay." She turns her life into a curriculum. If you’re looking at her story in The Cut and wondering what to actually take away from it, here’s the gist:
- Acknowledge the Shadow: Most people try to hide their "un-good" parts. Gilbert is putting her worst moments—the enabling, the murder plot, the addiction—on the front page. There’s a lesson there about the power of removing shame, even if her specific actions are extreme.
- Boundaries are Expensive: Gilbert’s ability to delete her inbox and "dance to at least one song" every morning is a goal, but it requires a hard look at what you’re willing to sacrifice. She sacrificed a marriage and a reputation for "goodness" to get there.
- The Danger of the "Guru": Gilbert made Rayya her guru, then nearly killed her. It's a stark warning against putting anyone on a pedestal to "save" you.
The narrative of Elizabeth Gilbert in The Cut is no longer about finding "Pizza and Prayer." It's about the messy, ugly, and sometimes dangerous reality of being human.
Next Steps for You
If you're struggling with caregiver burnout or codependency, look into resources for CODA (Codependents Anonymous) or SLAA, which Gilbert credits for her current peace. If you're a writer, consider the The Snow Forest controversy as a case study in the relationship between an author and their audience's political climate. Finally, check out Rayya Elias’s own memoir, Harley Loco, to see her story told in her own voice, rather than through Gilbert’s lens.