If you’ve ever sat through a wedding or watched a father-daughter dance, you know that specific, heavy-eyed feeling when the music hits just right. It’s a mix of nostalgia and that "oh god, I'm growing up" terror. First Man by Camila Cabello basically bottled that feeling and sold it to the world on her 2019 album Romance.
But honestly? Most people who hear it on the radio or see a clip on TikTok don't actually know the messy, tear-filled story behind how it was made. They think it's just another pop ballad. It isn't.
The Night in Nashville That Started It All
It was October. Camila was in Nashville, halfway through a tour, and she was exhausted. You’ve probably been there—that specific kind of homesickness that hits when you’re doing exactly what you dreamed of, but you just want your own bed and a hug from your parents. She walked into the studio with a laptop full of half-baked lyrics.
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She wasn't even planning on writing about her dad, Alejandro Cabello.
Suddenly, she just started talking. She was in her first "real" serious relationship at the time. Up until then, she’d been his little girl. The girl who didn't bring boys home. The girl who didn't have someone else's hand to hold.
During the writing session with Amy Wadge and Jordan Reynolds, Camila became a total wreck. She later admitted she had to keep running to the bathroom to sob because she couldn't get through the lyrics without breaking down. She literally couldn't sing the words "You're looking at me while you're walking me down the aisle" without losing it.
Who is the song actually about?
Okay, let’s clear this up. While the "First Man" is her father, the other man in the song—the one she’s "gonna stay with tonight"—was widely understood to be Shawn Mendes.
Lyrically, she’s trying to convince her dad that this new guy is okay.
- "He's kind."
- "He's funny like you sometimes."
- "He won't drink and drive."
It’s basically a three-minute reassurance session for a protective father who is terrified of losing his daughter to adulthood.
That 2020 Grammy Performance (And Why Everyone Cried)
If you didn't see the 62nd Grammy Awards, you missed one of the most awkward and beautiful moments in live TV history. Camila didn't stay on the stage. She walked down the steps, right up to the front row where Alejandro was sitting.
The production was simple: just a screen behind her showing grainy home videos of her as a toddler.
Alejandro was a mess. He was literally wiping tears away with a napkin while his daughter sang "You were the first man that really loved me" directly into his face. It was raw. It was also kind of intense to watch on a global stage, but it felt authentic in a way pop music rarely does anymore.
The Lyrics: A Breakdown of the Heartbreak
The song is a pop-rock piano ballad, but it reads like a diary entry. It's structured as a conversation.
- The First Verse: She’s coming home late. Her dad is waiting up. It’s that classic "dad move" where they can't sleep until they hear the door lock.
- The Bridge: This is the killer. She’s talking about a future wedding. She tells him that even when she’s wearing white, he’s still the guy who taught her what love looks like.
- The Twist: Most love songs are about the "One." This song argues that the "First" is just as important.
Why "First Man" Still Matters Years Later
Pop stars usually write about breakups or clubs. Writing a song about the realization that your parents are aging—and that your relationship with them is shifting—is risky. It’s "un-cool."
But "First Man" became a sleeper hit for a reason. It’s the ultimate Father-Daughter dance song. It’s played at thousands of weddings because it captures that specific transition from being a protected child to an independent adult who still needs a "constant safety."
Actionable Insights for Fans and Creators
If you’re a songwriter or just someone trying to connect with your own family, here’s what we can learn from Camila's approach to this track:
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- Vulnerability is a superpower: Camila almost didn't release this because it felt too personal. Those are usually the songs that resonate the most.
- Specific details win: Mentioning that "he won't drink and drive" makes the song feel real. It’s a specific fear a dad has.
- Multimedia storytelling: The music video, released on Father’s Day 2020, used actual home movies. If you’re making content, use your real life. People can smell "stock footage" a mile away.
Next time you’re listening, pay attention to the shaky breath in her voice during the final chorus. That wasn't edited out. It’s the sound of someone actually feeling what they’re singing.
To really appreciate the depth of the track, go back and watch the music video she dropped on Father's Day. It’s basically a highlight reel of Alejandro’s life as a dad. Grab some tissues. You’re gonna need them.