If you’ve spent any time on TikTok or watched the chaos of The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, you know the name Taylor Frankie Paul. She’s basically the face of MomTok drama. But behind every viral "soft-swinging" confession and tearful livestream, there’s a guy who was once at the center of it all before he chose a very different, quieter path. That guy is Tate Paul.
Honestly, it’s wild how fast things moved. One minute they were the "perfect" LDS couple dancing in their Draper, Utah kitchen, and the next, the entire internet was debating the mechanics of their marriage. While Taylor leaned into the spotlight—eventually landing her own reality show and even becoming the Bachelorette in 2026—Tate did the opposite. He vanished. Well, mostly.
Who Is Tate Paul? (Beyond the Headlines)
Tate Paul isn’t a reality star, even if he was adjacent to that world for years. He’s a guy from Utah who worked in sales and marketing. When he married Taylor back in November 2016, they were just two young Mormons starting a life together.
The couple didn’t waste any time. Nine months after saying "I do," they welcomed their daughter, Indy May, in August 2017. A few years later, in June 2020, their son Ocean arrived. If you look back at Taylor’s old TikToks (the ones that haven’t been scrubbed), Tate was the supportive, slightly awkward husband in the background of those viral dance clips. He was the "Instagram husband" before that term became a meme.
The Career Path
Unlike the influencers he lived among, Tate’s professional life was more corporate. He has experience in sales development and marketing, though he’s also a bit of a creative. On the side, he’s a music producer and DJ. If you dig deep enough on SoundCloud, you’ll find his remixes. It’s a far cry from the high-stakes drama of reality TV, which is likely why he wanted no part of the Hulu cameras.
What Really Happened with Taylor Frankie Paul’s Ex-Husband
The question everyone asks is: what broke them? In May 2022, Taylor hopped on a TikTok Live and dropped a bomb that effectively ended her marriage and fractured her entire social circle. She revealed that they were part of a "soft-swinging" group within the Mormon community.
Basically, the rules were: you could hook up with other people, but you couldn't "go all the way" and your spouse had to be present. It was a "lifestyle" choice that felt, to many outsiders, totally at odds with their LDS faith. But the real kicker? Taylor admitted she broke the rules. She developed an "emotional affair" and hooked up with a man in the group—Brayden Rowley—without Tate there.
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"No one is innocent. Everyone has hooked up with everyone," Taylor famously said during that livestream.
While Taylor was the one who went public, the fallout for Tate was massive. He didn't go on a press tour. He didn't make a "storytime" video. He just... left. He filed for divorce, and by the end of 2022, the marriage that started in a temple was legally over.
Why He Refused to Be on "Mormon Wives"
When Hulu started casting The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, Tate was a natural choice. Viewers wanted to hear his side. Was he really okay with the swinging? Did he feel betrayed? According to Taylor herself, Tate actually considered joining the cast with his new partner. Ultimately, they decided against it. They wanted privacy for themselves and, more importantly, for Indy and Ocean. It was a move that many fans actually respected, especially since the show became a lightning rod for controversy.
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Life After the Scandal: Where Is Tate Now?
If you’re looking for a revenge arc, you won't find one here. Tate Paul seems to have landed on his feet in a way that feels surprisingly healthy. He didn't stay single for long, and honestly, who can blame him? After the chaos of a public divorce, he found something steady.
Tate is now married to Bailey Paul (formerly Roberts), who works as an aesthetician. They went public with their relationship in 2023, and by 2024, they had tied the knot. It’s a complete 180 from his life with Taylor. Bailey isn't an "influencer" in the same way, though she’s featured in Tate’s music-focused TikToks from time to time.
A Growing Family
In 2025, Tate and Bailey welcomed a daughter of their own. This makes Tate a father of three. What’s actually kind of refreshing is how he and Taylor handle co-parenting. In recent interviews, Taylor has been surprisingly open about how well they get along. They show up to soccer games together. They talk daily. Even Taylor’s former boyfriend, Dakota Mortensen, reportedly got along with Tate.
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It’s a weird, modern, slightly messy Utah family dynamic, but it seems to work.
Lessons from the Tate and Taylor Era
Looking back at the trajectory of Taylor Frankie Paul’s ex-husband, there are a few things that stand out about how we consume celebrity (or "micro-celebrity") breakups:
- Privacy is a choice: Tate could have capitalized on the scandal. He could have written a book or started a "Team Tate" podcast. He chose to work a normal job and raise his kids instead.
- The "Vessel" Theory: In many ways, Tate was the "straight man" in a world of high-octane drama. His exit from the public eye shows that not everyone is built for—or wants—the fame that comes with a viral scandal.
- Co-parenting is possible: Despite the "soft-swinging" drama, the domestic violence charges Taylor later faced, and the public scrutiny, they’ve managed to keep the kids out of the line of fire.
If you're following the latest season of Mormon Wives or keeping up with Taylor's journey on The Bachelorette, remember that there's a whole other side to the story living quietly in Utah. Tate Paul might be the "ex-husband," but he’s also a guy who managed to rebuild a normal life after his world was turned upside down by a TikTok livestream.
If you’re curious about how the rest of the MomTok crew is holding up after the divorces, you should check out the latest updates on the McWhorters or the Rowleys. Most of those original "swinging" couples have also split, proving that the "lifestyle" had a much higher cost than anyone originally let on.