This or That List: Why We Can’t Stop Choosing Sides

This or That List: Why We Can’t Stop Choosing Sides

Decision fatigue is a real thing. Every single morning, you wake up and start a marathon of micro-choices that eventually drain your brain by 4:00 PM. But then, strangely, we go on social media and look for more things to decide. We love a good this or that list. It’s basically the internet’s version of a personality test without the 50-question commitment.

It's weirdly satisfying.

Think about the last time you saw a "Coffee vs. Tea" or "Sunrise vs. Sunset" graphic on Instagram or Pinterest. You probably didn't keep scrolling immediately. You paused. You picked. Maybe you even got a little defensive when you saw someone choose "Summer" over "Autumn." That’s the magic of these simple binaries. They aren't just games; they are tiny mirrors reflecting how we see ourselves.

The Psychology Behind the This or That List

Why do we care? Honestly, it’s about identity. Psychologist Leon Festinger’s Social Comparison Theory suggests that we determine our own social and personal worth based on how we stack up against others. When you engage with a this or that list, you are signaling your membership in a tribe. If you choose "Dogs" and "Mountains" and "Books," you’ve just painted a low-res portrait of your soul for the world to see.

There’s also the "Paradox of Choice." Barry Schwartz, an American psychologist, famously argued that having too many options actually makes us miserable. Life is messy and full of infinite shades of gray. A this or that list is a relief because it reduces the entire universe down to two distinct, manageable pillars. It’s binary. It’s clean. It’s easy.

People think these lists are just for kids or bored teenagers. They're wrong. Marketers use them to drive engagement because the "comment rate" on a binary choice is significantly higher than on a standard "tell us what you think" post. It’s easier to click a button or type one word than it is to formulate an original thought. We're lazy. That's just human nature.

Breaking Down the Most Polarizing Categories

If you want to start a digital riot, just post a list about food. It's the ultimate equalizer. Everyone eats, and everyone has a hill they are willing to die on.

Take the classic "Pancakes vs. Waffles" debate. It’s not just about batter. It’s about texture, syrup retention, and childhood nostalgia. Waffle supporters will point to the structural integrity and the "syrup pockets," while pancake purists argue for the soft, pillowy mouthfeel that a waffle can't replicate. It gets heated. Same goes for "Coke vs. Pepsi" or the legendary "Pineapple on Pizza" divide.

Travel and Lifestyle Binaries

Then you have the lifestyle choices. These feel a bit more aspirational.

  • City Break vs. Beach Escape: This usually reveals if you’re looking for stimulation or total shutdown.
  • Early Bird vs. Night Owl: This one feels almost biological.
  • Glamping vs. Roughing It: A test of how much you actually value indoor plumbing when you're "connecting with nature."

The travel ones are interesting because they often reflect who we want to be, rather than who we are. You might choose "Backpacking Europe" on a list while currently sitting on a plush couch with a bag of chips. It’s a form of digital daydreaming.

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Why Brands Are Obsessed With These Lists

Business owners, listen up. If you aren't using this format, you're leaving money—or at least data—on the table. When a skincare brand asks "Serums or Creams?", they aren't just making small talk. They are conducting a poll. They are seeing what their audience values in real-time without paying for a focus group.

It's low-friction market research.

Usually, the most successful lists are those that feel slightly "low stakes." If the choice is too heavy, people keep scrolling. If it’s "Save $1,000 or End World Hunger," it’s too lopsided. But "French Fries or Onion Rings?" That is a legitimate dilemma. That requires a second of thought.

Creating Your Own This or That List

If you’re making one for your friends or your followers, don't make it boring. "Red vs. Blue" is a snooze. You need to tap into specific subcultures.

If you're targeting gamers, go with "Physical Disc vs. Digital Download." If you're talking to 9-to-5ers, try "Remote Work vs. Office Culture." The key is to find the friction. Where do people disagree? That’s where the engagement lives.

Try to mix up the categories. Don't just do ten food questions. Throw a curveball in there.

  1. Morning Shower vs. Night Shower
  2. Audiobook vs. Physical Book
  3. Calling vs. Texting (This one usually reveals a massive generational gap)
  4. Board Games vs. Video Games
  5. Small Party vs. Big Club

See? You’re already picking in your head. It’s unavoidable.

The Dark Side of Binaries

We should probably acknowledge that life isn't actually a this or that list. The danger of these lists—if we take them too seriously—is that they reinforce "us vs. them" mentalities. In a world that is already incredibly polarized, reducing everything to two choices can be a bit reductive. Sometimes the answer is "both" or "neither" or "it depends on the weather and my mood."

But for the sake of a five-minute distraction on a Tuesday afternoon? They’re harmless. They remind us that even if we disagree on everything else, we can all agree that choosing between "Tacos" and "Sushi" is the hardest decision a human can make.

Actionable Steps for Using This or That Lists

If you want to actually use this concept to boost your social presence or just have better conversations, here is how you do it effectively.

For Social Media Growth:
Stop posting static images. Use the "Poll" or "Slider" features on platforms like Instagram or TikTok. It’s one-tap engagement. Also, make sure your "This" and "That" are actually comparable. Don't compare "Apples" to "Trans-Atlantic Flights." Keep the theme consistent.

For Icebreakers:
If you're leading a meeting or a first date is stalling, pull out a specific this or that list. Avoid the cliches. Ask something like, "Would you rather have a 5-minute commute to a job you hate, or a 1-hour commute to a job you love?" That’s a choice that tells you something real about a person's values.

For Personal Reflection:
Look at a list and pay attention to why you're choosing what you're choosing. Are you picking "Ocean" because you love swimming, or because the "Mountains" remind you of a cold trip you hated? It's a quick way to audit your current preferences and biases.

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For Content Creators:
Create a "This or That" template that is branded with your colors. Use it once a week. It creates a rhythm for your audience. They’ll start to look for it. When they comment their answers, reply to them. Argue—playfully—with their "wrong" choices. That back-and-forth is what the algorithms crave.

The reality is that we are lived-in, complicated creatures. But sometimes, it's just nice to know if someone prefers "Pillows: Hard or Soft." It’s the small things that build the big picture. Start with a simple list, watch the debate unfold, and remember that it’s okay if someone picks the "wrong" side of the pizza debate. They’re still human. Probably.