You’ve probably seen the TikToks. The ones where a guy with a slightly bewildered but game expression is trying to keep up with high-energy dance choreography while his wife, Whitney Leavitt, beams at the camera. If you followed the "soft swinging" scandal that blew up the Mormon MomTok world a few years back, or if you’ve been binge-watching The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives on Hulu, you know exactly who he is.
Conner Leavitt isn't just a background character in Whitney's viral empire. He’s become a central figure in a messy, public, and surprisingly heavy conversation about marriage, faith, and what happens when the "perfect" Mormon image hits reality.
Honestly, people have a lot of opinions about him. Some see a supportive husband who moved his whole life to Hawaii and back to save his marriage. Others see a man whose online history sparked a thousand "lavender marriage" theories. But if you look past the 15-second clips, the story of Whitney Leavitt's husband is a lot more complicated than a simple "villain" or "hero" edit.
The Meet-Cute That Almost Didn't Happen
Fate is a weird thing. Before they were ever "Whitney and Conner," Whitney was actually on her Mormon mission in Georgia. While she was there, she became close with Conner’s family. She didn’t know him yet, but she knew the people who made him.
Fast forward to 2015. They both ended up on a double date, but here’s the kicker: they weren't the ones dating each other. They were both there as "wingmen" for their friends. When the other couple basically bailed, Whitney and Conner were left to entertain themselves.
It worked. They hit it off, and by the summer of 2016, they were getting married at the Mormon temple in Provo, Utah. They did the whole classic bridal shoot at In-N-Out, looking like the ultimate LDS power couple.
The Tinder, the Porn, and the Hawaii Move
Things weren't always as shiny as the Instagram filters made them look. When The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives premiered, it dropped a bombshell: Whitney and Conner had briefly left Utah for Hawaii not for a vacation, but to escape a collapsing marriage.
Whitney revealed that Conner had been struggling with a pornography addiction. In many cultures, that’s a "talk it out" issue. In the strict world of the LDS church, it's often viewed as a massive breach of temple covenants. But it went deeper. Whitney found out Conner had a Tinder profile.
Rumors immediately caught fire. People on Reddit and TikTok started speculating that he was actually on Grindr, leading to the "lavender marriage" label—a term for a marriage of convenience used to hide someone's true sexuality.
Addressing the Elephant in the Room
The Leavitts didn't hide. They leaned into it, sometimes with humor that made people even more confused. Whitney posted TikToks joking about having a "gay boyfriend" while kissing Conner. It was their way of saying, "We see what you're saying, and we don't care."
During an emotional reunion for the show in 2025, Conner finally pulled back the curtain on why he sought validation through those apps. He shared that he had been sexually assaulted as a young boy. It was a heavy, gut-wrenching moment that shifted the perspective for a lot of viewers. He explained that his "destructive habits" were a coping mechanism for trauma he had buried for years.
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What Does Conner Leavitt Actually Do for Work?
People always ask this. "Does the husband have a job, or is he just a TikTok prop?"
He actually has a pretty legit career outside of social media. For a long time, Conner worked as a technical analyst. As of late 2025, he was working for a newly formed hedge fund based in Dubai.
Because his bosses are in a completely different time zone, he works remotely from their home in St. George, Utah. This setup is basically what allows Whitney to do things like Dancing with the Stars. When Whitney moved to LA for the show, Conner stepped up as the primary caregiver for their three kids:
- Sedona (their oldest daughter)
- Liam (the son from the infamous RSV hospital dance video)
- Billy Gene (their youngest, born in 2024)
Why the Leavitts Still Matter in 2026
Whether you love them or find them polarizing, Whitney and Conner represent a shift in how we view "influencer marriages." They stopped trying to be the perfect Mormon family and started being the messy, trauma-informed, "working on it" family.
Conner has become a vocal advocate for men going to therapy. He even pushed other husbands from the show, like Zac Affleck, to seek help. It’s a weirdly wholesome turn for a couple that started their reality TV journey surrounded by cheating rumors.
Actionable Takeaways from the Leavitt Saga
If you're following their journey for more than just the drama, there are a few real-world lessons to pull from how they've handled the spotlight:
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- Radical Transparency: The Leavitts found that the rumors were worse than the truth. By coming clean about the Tinder profile and the addiction issues, they took the power away from the gossip.
- Supportive Pivoting: Notice how Conner adjusted his career to support Whitney’s DWTS run. In modern marriages, sometimes one partner has to take the lead while the other manages the "home base."
- Healing Isn't Linear: Conner’s revelation about his childhood trauma shows that "bad behavior" often has deep roots. Addressing the root cause in therapy is the only way to actually change the pattern.
The next time you see Whitney Leavitt's husband dancing slightly off-beat in the background of a video, remember there's a lot more going on than just a viral trend. He’s a guy who survived a public marriage meltdown and decided to stay and do the work.