Stop blaming your tools. Stop blaming the economy, your boss, or that one coworker who always misses the deadline. If you’ve spent any time in a leadership role—or even just trying to get your own life together—you’ve probably heard of Jocko Willink and Leif Babin. They wrote a book that basically slapped the corporate world across the face.
Extreme Ownership: How U.S. Navy SEALs Lead and Win isn't just a catchy title. It's a mindset that came out of the bloody, high-stakes chaos of the Battle of Ramadi. Jocko and Leif weren't just "managers" there; they were task unit commanders in SEAL Team 3, leading some of the most intense urban combat operations in the Iraq War.
Here is the thing. Most people think leadership is about giving orders. It isn't. Not really.
It’s about owning everything in your world. The failures. The mistakes. The stuff that wasn't even technically your fault. If you are the leader, it is your fault. That's a bitter pill for most people to swallow, but it's the only way to actually win.
The Day Everything Went Wrong
Let's talk about the "Blue-on-Blue." In the military, that’s the term for friendly fire. It is the nightmare scenario. During a complex operation in Ramadi, a series of communication breakdowns led to SEALs and other U.S. forces engaging each other. It was a disaster. Men were wounded. The fog of war was thick.
When it came time for the debrief, Jocko sat in a room full of his superiors and his men. He knew people were looking for someone to fire. He could have blamed the radio guy. He could have blamed the foggy intel. He could have blamed the junior officer who moved to the wrong position.
He didn't.
He stood up and said, "There is only one person to blame for this: me."
By taking full responsibility, he didn't lose his job. He actually gained more trust. Why? Because if the leader owns the mistake, the team knows the leader will fix the mistake. If the leader blames someone else, everyone starts looking for a place to hide. You can't lead from a bunker of excuses.
Why Your Business Feels Like a Mess
Most organizations suffer from a lack of "Commander's Intent." Basically, the boss has a plan in their head, but the people on the front lines have no idea what the actual goal is. They just have a list of tasks.
In Extreme Ownership: How U.S. Navy SEALs Lead and Win, the authors break down "Decentralized Command." This doesn't mean "let everyone do whatever they want." It means everyone understands the mission so well that they can make decisions without asking for permission every five seconds.
Think about it. If you’re a SEAL in a gunfight, you can’t wait for a radio check to decide whether to move left or right. You have to know what the goal is. In business, if your marketing team has to ask the CEO for permission to change a single word in a Facebook ad, your company is going to move at the speed of a glacier. You'll lose. Simple as that.
The Four Laws of Combat
Jocko and Leif didn't invent these out of thin air. They observed what worked when people were literally trying to kill them. It turns out, these same rules apply when you're trying to launch a software product or manage a retail store.
- Cover and Move. This is just teamwork. It’s the most basic tactic. One element moves while the other provides cover. In a company, this means the sales team and the production team shouldn't be fighting. They should be covering each other. If sales sells something production can't build, they both fail.
- Simple. Complexity is the enemy. If a plan is too complex, people won't understand it. If they don't understand it, they can't execute it when things go sideways. And things always go sideways.
- Prioritize and Execute. You’re overwhelmed. You have fifty emails, a broken server, and a crying toddler. What do you do? You don't try to do it all. You pick the biggest problem, focus everyone on it, and then move to the next. Relax, look around, make a call.
- Decentralized Command. We touched on this. You lead small teams. Those small teams lead smaller teams. No one should be managing more than six to ten people directly. Any more than that and you lose control.
The "Ego" Problem
The biggest hurdle to Extreme Ownership: How U.S. Navy SEALs Lead and Win isn't lack of skill. It's ego. Honestly, it’s always the ego.
Nobody wants to admit they screwed up. It feels bad. Our brains are wired to protect our self-image. We look for external factors to explain our failures because it makes us feel better in the short term. But "feeling better" doesn't get the job done.
When you check your ego at the door, you become a student of the game. You start asking, "How can I be better?" instead of "Why is everyone else so incompetent?" It’s a massive shift. It changes the molecular structure of a team.
I’ve seen this in tech startups. The founder who thinks they are the smartest person in the room usually ends up driving the company into a wall. The founder who says, "I don't know the answer, let's figure it out," is the one who survives.
Leading Up the Chain
This is the part most people get wrong. They think Extreme Ownership is only for the "top guy." Wrong.
If your boss isn't giving you the support you need, that is your fault. You haven't educated them. You haven't given them the information they need in a way they can digest. Instead of complaining about a "bad boss," you need to lead up the chain of command.
How? By building a relationship. By taking things off their plate. By proving that you are reliable. If you want more autonomy, you have to earn it by being the person who never drops the ball.
It’s kind of ironic. To get more freedom, you have to be more disciplined. Jocko has a saying for this: "Discipline equals freedom." It sounds like a paradox, but it’s the truth. If you have the discipline to get your work done early, you have the freedom to do what you want with the rest of your day. If you have the discipline to follow a strict budget, you have the financial freedom to take risks later.
It’s Not Just for War Zones
People sometimes dismiss these concepts because "business isn't war." And they’re right. Nobody is (usually) shooting at you in a boardroom. But the human psychology is exactly the same. Stress is stress. Fear is fear.
Whether you’re in a SEAL platoon or a suburban dental office, the dynamics of human interaction don't change. People want to follow leaders who are humble, decisive, and—most importantly—accountable.
I remember a specific case involving a manufacturing plant that was failing. High turnover, low morale, terrible safety record. The new manager didn't come in and fire everyone. He didn't buy new machines. He just started taking ownership of the safety issues. He didn't blame the "lazy workers." He blamed the training programs he had inherited. He took responsibility for the messy floor.
Within six months, the culture flipped. When the workers saw the boss picking up trash and owning the safety lapses, they started doing the same. Ownership is contagious.
Common Misconceptions
Some people take this too far and become door-mats. That's not what this is. Taking ownership of a mistake doesn't mean you just sit there and get beat up. It means you acknowledge the error and then present a solution.
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Also, it’s not about doing everyone's job for them. If you try to do everyone's job, you aren't leading. You're micromanaging. That is the opposite of decentralized command. Your job as a leader is to provide the resources and the "why," and then get out of the way so your people can execute.
Another thing—don't think this is a "quick fix." You can't just read the book on a Sunday and have a perfect team on Monday. This is a lifestyle. It’s a daily grind of looking in the mirror and asking, "What did I mess up today?"
Actionable Steps to Implement Extreme Ownership
If you want to actually use this stuff and not just talk about it, you have to start small. Don't try to overhaul your whole company in a week.
Audit your excuses. For the next 24 hours, pay attention to every time you say "because" when explaining a failure. "We missed the deadline because the client was slow." Stop right there. The real answer is: "We missed the deadline because I didn't follow up with the client early enough to account for their delay."
Simplify your communication. Look at the last email you sent to your team. Was it a wall of text? Did it have five different "priorities"? Delete it. Send a new one with one clear goal and three simple steps.
Empower a subordinate. Give someone a task that you usually handle. Don't tell them how to do it. Tell them what the end result needs to look like. Then, leave them alone. If they fail, it's your fault for not training them. If they succeed, give them all the credit.
Focus on the "Why." Before you start your next project, make sure everyone on the team can explain the mission in one sentence. If they can't, you haven't done your job as a leader.
Check your ego at the door. Next time someone criticizes your work, don't defend it. Listen. Say, "You're right, I could have done that better. How would you suggest I handle it next time?" You'll be amazed at how quickly people stop being defensive when you stop being defensive first.
Leadership isn't a rank or a title. It's a choice. It's the choice to stop being a victim of circumstances and start being the architect of your own success. It’s hard. It’s uncomfortable. But it’s the only way to win.