Walk into any bar in Marshfield, Hanson, or Duxbury and ask where to get the best bar pizza. You’re going to start a fight. It’s inevitable. But amidst the shouting matches over lace edges and burnt cheese, one name always anchors the conversation: Poopsies.
Located right on Route 139, Poopsies Pizza Pembroke MA isn't just a restaurant. It’s a time capsule. It’s a vibe that hasn't changed since your dad was sneaking out of the house in the 70s. If you’re looking for artisanal, wood-fired sourdough crust with truffle oil drippings, keep driving. You won't find that here. This is South Shore bar pizza in its purest, most unapologetic form.
Thin. Greasy. Crispy. Square-cut slices that defy the laws of physics.
The Mystery of the Poopsies Crust
What actually makes Poopsies Pizza Pembroke MA different from the dozen other spots claiming to have the best bar pie? It’s the pan. Honestly, those pans have probably seen more history than the local library.
South Shore bar pizza is a specific beast. It has to be 10 inches. It has to be cooked in a shallow, high-sided steel pan that’s been seasoned by decades of oil and high heat. At Poopsies, the crust hits that specific "cracker-like" texture that’s hard to replicate at home. It’s not doughy. It’s not floppy. If you pick up a slice and it sags, something went wrong—but at Poopsies, it rarely does.
The cheese goes all the way to the edge. That’s the "lace" people talk about. It’s where the cheese hits the hot metal of the pan and caramelizes into a black, crispy, salty rim. Some people actually order "extra laced" just to get more of that burnt-cheese goodness. It sounds wrong if you aren't from around here, but once you try it, you get it.
It’s Not Just About the Pizza
If you’ve ever actually stepped inside, you know the atmosphere is... specific. It’s dark. Like, "did my eyes adjust yet?" dark. The wood paneling and the low ceilings give it this basement-hangout feel that makes you want to order a cheap beer and stay for three hours.
There’s a certain grit to it. It’s the kind of place where the regulars have "their" stools and the staff knows exactly how many pickles you want on your cheeseburger pizza before you even open your mouth. It feels lived-in. In a world of corporate-designed "industrial chic" restaurants, Poopsies feels like a place that grew out of the ground exactly as it is.
What to Actually Order (Beyond the Plain Cheese)
Most people start with a plain cheese or a pepperoni, and honestly, you can't go wrong there. The pepperoni curls up into little cups of grease that hold the flavor perfectly. But if you want the real Poopsies experience, you have to look at the weird stuff.
The Cheeseburger Pizza is a local legend.
Think about it: ground beef, onions, and those specific, salty pickles. It sounds like a chaotic mess, but the way the pickles cut through the richness of the cheese is basically culinary magic. It’s the kind of pizza you crave at 9:00 PM on a Tuesday when the world feels a bit too heavy.
Then there’s the Chili Pizza.
Yes, chili. On a pizza.
It’s heavy. It’s messy. It’s definitely not a "first date" food unless your date is also a South Shore native who understands the assignment. The chili adds a spicy, earthy depth that standard tomato sauce just can't touch.
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- Pro Tip: If you're dining in, ask for the "burnt edges."
- The Salad: Surprisingly, people swear by the salad here. It’s usually a simple iceberg mix, but the dressing is what hooks people. It provides a crisp, cold contrast to the piping hot, oily pizza.
- The Drinks: Keep it simple. A cold draft beer or a soda. This isn't the place for a craft cocktail with a sprig of rosemary.
Why the "Bar Pizza" Culture is So Intense
To understand Poopsies Pizza Pembroke MA, you have to understand the cult of the South Shore bar pizza. This isn't New York style. It’s not Chicago deep dish. It’s a hyper-regional delicacy found almost exclusively in a small cluster of towns south of Boston.
Establishments like the Cape Cod Cafe in Brockton or Lynwood Cafe in Randolph are the "big siblings" in this world, but Poopsies holds its own because of its consistency. There’s a comfort in knowing that a pizza you bought in 1995 is going to taste exactly like the one you buy in 2026.
The "bar" part of the name is key. These pizzas were originally designed to keep people in their seats at the bar. They’re small (10 inches), salty (makes you thirsty), and easy to eat with one hand while holding a drink in the other.
Dealing with the Wait
Let’s be real for a second. Poopsies is busy.
If you call in an order on a Friday night, don't be shocked if the wait time is over an hour. Sometimes more. The kitchen is small, the demand is high, and they don't rush the process. If they rushed it, the crust wouldn't be right.
Taking it to go is a gamble. Bar pizza is best consumed within roughly four minutes of leaving the oven. The steam from the box is the enemy of a crispy crust. If you’re driving back to the other side of Pembroke, crack the box open a little bit to let the steam escape. Better yet, just eat it in the car. We’ve all done it.
Common Misconceptions About Poopsies
Some people walk in expecting a full-service Italian restaurant. They’re disappointed.
- It’s small. The seating is tight. You might be bumping elbows with a stranger. That’s part of the charm, honestly.
- It’s cash-friendly. While things have modernized a bit over the years, it’s always smart to have a few 20s in your pocket just in case.
- The "Poopsie" Name. People always ask. It’s a nickname. It’s quirky. It sticks in your head. It’s better than "Generic Pizza Shop #4," right?
Navigating the Menu Like a Local
If you want to look like you know what you’re doing, don't over-complicate your order. The beauty of Poopsies is in the simplicity.
A "special" usually involves onions, peppers, and mushrooms, but many locals prefer a "well done" plain pie to really appreciate the structural integrity of the crust. If you're feeling adventurous, the buffalo chicken pizza has a cult following, but it’s a departure from the traditional bar pizza experience.
The Greek salad is another sleeper hit. It’s nothing fancy, just fresh ingredients and a solid house dressing, but it’s the perfect palate cleanser between slices of greasy pepperoni.
Actionable Steps for Your Visit
If you’re planning a trip to Poopsies Pizza Pembroke MA, here is how you do it right to avoid the "rookie" mistakes.
Check the Hours Before You Leave
They aren't open 24/7. Like many local staples, they have specific hours, and they sometimes close unexpectedly for holidays or private events. Give them a quick ring or check their social media presence if you're coming from out of town.
Call Ahead for Takeout
Do not just show up and expect a 10-minute turnaround. On weekends, the phone line can be busy for 20 minutes straight. Keep redialing. It’s worth the effort.
Embrace the "Laced" Edge
When you order, specifically ask for it "laced" or "well done." This ensures you get that dark, caramelized cheese ring around the perimeter. If you like a softer crust, ignore this, but you’d be missing out on the signature South Shore experience.
Bring an Appetite, Not a Crowd
The interior isn't built for a party of 15. If you have a huge group, plan to take the pizzas to a local park or back to someone's house. For the best experience, go with one or two friends, snag a couple of stools, and eat the pizza while the cheese is still bubbling.
Explore the Variations
Once you’ve had the classic cheese, try the pickle-heavy cheeseburger pie. It sounds like a "food challenge" item, but it is legitimately one of the best-balanced pizzas on the South Shore. The acidity of the pickles handles the fat of the cheese perfectly.
Poopsies remains a cornerstone of the Pembroke community because it refuses to be anything other than itself. It’s a dive bar that happens to serve world-class pizza. It’s loud, it’s dark, and the food is consistently excellent. In a world of changing trends, that kind of reliability is why people keep coming back decade after decade.